Brighton and Hove Albion defender Jan Paul van Hecke has admitted this season has been a tough one for him after the death of his father last year.
The centre-back has been speaking to Voetbal International, relayed by Fean Online, about the campaign so far in which he has made just three appearances in the Premier League.
The defender returned to Brighton in the summer after a loan deal at Blackburn Rovers last season in which he was a regular for the Championship side.
That has not been the case for him at Brighton, where he has struggled for gametime and managed just eight appearances for the first team all season, spending most of it on the bench or out of the squad entirely.
“I’ve had a very hard time,” he admitted to the newspaper.
“A depressing feeling every day. Then I just stayed in my bed. I didn’t feel like anything in the first few months.
“The idea of my mother being alone, I couldn’t handle it. When you’re in England, you can’t visit your mother after training.
“It’s something you see in others, but suddenly it happens to you. I really called my father every day. About everything.
“He was so involved; I still miss that every day. Every ride to the club I wanted to call him. When he is suddenly gone, life becomes very different.
“I made my basic debut in the Premier League against Leicester City, played against Stoke and I came in against Leeds United. Then you have the feeling: I’m standing here, but my father would have loved this so much.”
